I'm Drunk, I Love You: A Sober Take On Unrequited Love

My favorite scene in JP Habac’s I’m Drunk, I Love You was when Dio (Paulo Avelino) started talking about his insecurities as an aspiring filmmaker, comparing himself with batch mates that were already featured in Young Star. The sound of frustration in Dio’s words clearly established the weight and meaning of it, especially if you’re a young Filipino artist. Carson (Maja Salvador), being the super best friend that she is, immediately turns it into a joke and tells Dio, “Mas bagay ka kasi sa Abante.”

The thing is, I know exactly how Dio feels towards Young Star. The same way I also know how Carson feels towards Dio. Both romantic, both juvenile and silly. I’m Drunk I Love You made me realise, GRADUATE NA TALAGA AKO SA DALAWANG ISSUE NA ‘YAN. But who am I to judge Dio and Carson, they needed to go through those yearnings so they could grow up.

Quirks and Intimacy

Watching I’m Drunk, I Love You felt like tagging along with Carson, Dio and Jason Ty. Fine, isama na natin si Pathy. It was entertaining and funny. The little frienship traditions were engaging — their common love for cheap alcohol and Peter’s Butterball, the love for OPM and the iPod game, and of course, the unparalleled fondness for Bagnet. Although I knew about the quirks, for some reason, I didn’t feel the intimate with Carson and Dio. I felt I was seeing the movie only through Carson’s limited point of view.

I wish I knew why Carson loves Dio so much — beyond Dio being good looking and talented. I wish I knew why Dio suddenly wanted to take up law, even without him explaining it Carson. It can be just between him and me (as the audience). I wish I knew little extra about Pathy, not just about the extra H in her name. Why did Pathy and Dio break up? What did Dio like about Pathy? But Jason Ty definitely felt like a real best friend to me.

Old Trope, New Focus

I’m Drunk, I Love You’s premise is not new. In fact, it utilises a romcom trope that has been recycled for so many years — Reality Bites, My Best Friend’s Wedding, Labs Kita Okey Ka Lang, Close To You, She’s The One — I think I’ve seen most of them. (Obviously, it’s my favorite trope.)

But I’m Drunk, I Love You gives it a fresh take by shifting the focus from the epic goal of winning the guy to the simple task of getting the emotion out of the f*cking way. When Carson admitted her feelings to Dio, it felt at first like a drunken declaration of love. But when she pulled away from Dio’s kisses, she proved to be emotionally sober. Carson knew they were kisses of consolation. (Sabi nga ni Jeff Buckley, “Kiss me out of desire, not out of consolation.”)

Sobering Up

“Huwag kang mag-sorry. Hindi mo kasalanan na hindi mo ako mahal.” Carson told Dio the day after the eventful night.

I’m Drunk, I Love You was not a love story. It was about finally moving forward. And it starts with a making a decision, which ultimately is empowering. In the last scene of the movie, I cried. No, it’s not when Sugarfree’s Burnout started to play. It was when Carson broke into laughter, leaving Dio completely clueless about it. At that moment, I knew she made a decision — to continue being Dio’s best friend, sans the pining and hoping. Carson finally realised that her life, her happiness, is up to her. Carson decided to grow up.


Why We All Need Simon

Don’t get me wrong. I am rooting for Clark and Leah — that’s why I think On The Wings Of Love needed Simon.

First of all, I appreciate how Simon’s character is carefully crafted. His backstory was a bittersweet metamorphosis from a shy nerd to a sophisticate, all because of the right kind of love. His tragic love story with Juliet gave enough reason for me to believe that, hey, this guy had been through a lot. For sure, Simon’s already all grown up, making him the ultimate foil to Leah and Clark as a couple, and as individuals.

LeMon

Simon and Leah

If you carefully notice, Leah never had someone to look up to. Leah started out as a lost girl who wanted to find her mother. Her dreams were not for herself but for her family. She was a character that only reacts to whatever her fate in San Francisco throws at her. When she retuned to Manila and started working in advertising, she met Simon. Simon made Leah appreciate the difference between a job and a career. Finally, Leah was making plans and setting goals for herself, while her family also benefits as well.

Maybe not everyone will understand, but having a mentor is one of the best things that can happen to anyone. A mentor fulfils a certain facet in a person’s life that romantic love or familial love cannot fill in — self actualisation.

Simon gives Leah the great opportunity to self-actualise. To go beyond making ends meet and find a passion that pays. Through Simon, Leah actually hones her talent and grows as an individual. In Leah’s eyes, Simon is her mentor.  That’s pretty clear to me. To her, Simon is everything she dreams of becoming — secure, confident, stable and independent.

ClarkMon

Simon and Clark

Leah would always describe Clark as perfect. Clark was Leah’s hero — always there to protect her, defend her and help her. San Francisco may have robbed Clark of a normal childhood, personal and educational growth but Clark compensated with hard work, creativity and grit. In essence, Clark is the human equivalent of diskarte.

Here comes Simon — the Summa Cum Laude from one of the top universities in the Philippines, one of the youngest Executive Creative Directors in the advertising industry. Good on paper — everything Clark is not. And that drives Clark crazy insecure, crazy jealous, exposing our supposedly perfect hubby’s cracks and flaws — a mark of great writing! The more flawed the characters are, the more human they become.

Basically, Simon’s sheer existence has humanised Clark. Clark is no longer the dreamy, brooding amboy that he was. It also doesn’t help that Simon is witty, calculated, and eloquent. He knows how to subtly push Clark’s buttons without getting himself intro trouble. But that gets Leah into trouble.

CLeahMn

Simon and #CLeah

Of course, Simon’s character was definitely designed to rock the couple’s boat. Fiction blooms in conflict. I refuse to see Simon as a third party because clearly, Leah admires him as a mentor and not as a romantic partner. Leah is not cheating in any way, whether physically and emotionally. She’s merely building her universe as an individual person, beyond her being Clark’s wife. And Simon has a clear role in her universe.

What makes Simon’s character further interesting is his evolving feelings for Leah — from professional admiration to romantic aspirations. I cannot blame him. In fact, it’s easy to comprehend: It’s so easy to fall in love with a person who stimulates your mind. After all, falling in love happens inside the head. But this makes Leah and Simon’s relationship imbalanced, affecting Leah and Clark’s.

Also with Simon’s existence, the immaturity of Leah and Clark as a couple is magnified. Obviously, Simon is an issue both of them cannot handle very well. Clark starts to become passive aggressive about his feelings while Leah gets constantly accused of being selfish and punished for being unassuming. Makes me rethink if Leah and Clark are actually ready to get married, and more so, are they marrying for the right reasons?

Simon and Us (The Audience)

On The Wings Of Love is a TV series starring the love team of JaDine. Although it may have been inspired by its creators’ personal experiences, at the end of the day, it is a work of fiction. JaDine is a love team, so it is understandable for the audience, us,  to expect lots of kilig moments.

But I’d like to believe that the creators of On The Wings Of Love are more than the kilig moments they churn out. They are storytellers, love storytellers, to be more specific. And the greatest love stories are about relationships, about people who work their ways around their own flaws and imperfections. Relationships have kilig moments but a collection of kilig moments does not make a relationship.

Simon challenging #CLeah is a good exercise in watching fiction. If there’s such a thing as “writing problem”, or “directing problem” there is also a thing as “watching problem.” The kind of narrative On The Wings Of Love is exposing us stretches our watching behavior. Where do we draw the line between Clark and James, Leah and Nadine, Simon and Paulo? Up to what extent can we comprehend the characters’ conflicts and points of view? Are we only watching On The Wings Of Love for the kilig moments or are we truly invested on Clark and Leah’s journey?

Simon and Paulo Avelino

Can we take the moment to realise and appreciate how brilliant it is casting Paulo Avelino as Simon? Paulo Avelino exudes an intoxicating artsy mystery, like an untamed, brooding gentleman. His styling is polished and sharp, but the way he talks is still imperfect (with a slight lisp, missing some pronunciations) which adds to the nerd-turned-executive charm. He melts well — he can give you cold, he can give you tender. And as a public figure, he’s too cool to care about the social media wrath of the JaDine fans.

You, Me and OTWOL

Lastly, I really hope more women gets to understand Leah. I’m not here to argue, but I would just like to offer perspective. On The Wings Of Love is shot in an omniscient, third person point of view, meaning, we all know the characters’ true feelings, thoughts and intentions. Making us know more than Leah. We may know that Clark’s jealousy truly has basis, and that Simon’s actually starting to take things personal. But Simon's true feelings are beyond Leah's knowledge. Yes, she may feel it, but based on how things are turning out — she seems clueless. I’d like to think that Leah is just the type of girl who doesn’t want to assume. She’s been like that ever since. Clark took her to a DIY prom and still she chose not to assume that Clark loves her. That’s why I don’t think she’ll ever assume Simon is in love with her, unless Simon expresses it directly. Another thing, it is quite tricky and risky to actually assume that kind of thing about your boss.

But more than anything, I am really happy that On The Wings Of Love happened to local television. I think it has opened interesting discussions and discourse, revealing the diverse psychographics of the audience, indirectly touching on feminism. And although we may not agree with each other's opinions, but there’s a respectful way to express ourselves.

*** Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs Photo from Wikipedia.

Reimagining Darna

I grew up with two Darnas to look up to -- Nanette Medved's and Anjanette Abayari's. We didn't have cable before. I would ask my Ninong to tell me more about Vilma Santos' Darna, just so I could complete the Darna collection in my head.

That's why when I saw the teaser of Direk Erik Matti's Darna 2016 while watching Honor Thy Father, I couldn't contain my excitement. My childhood memories and fantasies were awakened. How would this year's Darna be like?

DarnaI wasn't too convinced on her costume before. Aside from the fact that she was being hyper-sexualized, I always thought it would be quite uncomfortable to fight bad guys in a strapless bra-top and heeled boots. So in my head, I had always imagined Darna to have more cover. And maybe she can also be the type of woman who prefers sneakers.

I also think Narda shouldn't lose her powers of discernment--especially the moral choices of a flawed human being-- whenever she turns into Darna. It would be interesting to see simple a Filipina who remains who she is when empowered by supernatural forces. That would be a good study on the idea of power.

Of course, I also thought of how Cameron Stewart redesigned Batgirl and Barbara Gordon. He made her techie skills more relevant. Maybe Darna could also be more tech-savvy--maybe even collaborating with local hacktivists.

Can't wait to find out who will play Narda/Darna. And of course, I wanna see what's the new vision for her mythology.

 


My History with Wacom

2008, I was about to graduate from college when I bought my first Wacom Pen Tablet, as a Christmas gift for myself. It was the Bamboo Fun model. I remember to have wondered what was the mouse for. But still, the pen tablet was magnificent.

Not until that one time that I dropped my pen and the nib broke. I tried replacing the nib, thanks to the nib donations from my friends. But it didn't work. I didn't want to buy an entirely new Wacom Pen Tablet set since the tablet wasn't broken. And that's when I found Ynzal Marketing, a tech and gadget store that had almost all Wacom products and, thank goodness, spare parts. At that time, they had a Bamboo Fun pen sold separately. And conveniently, Ynzal delivers it to you the next day!

2010, I dropped my pen again and it instantly broke, I figured it was about time to finally get myself a new Wacom set. After all, without the Wacom tablet, I wouldn't be able to do my work and my other projects. So again, I ordered a Wacom set from Ynzal and had it delivered. This time, it was the very sleek and sexy Wacom Bamboo Pen Touch.

I can say that I've done a lot projects with the Bamboo Touch. I love it so much I even put a dymo of my name all over it. Our relationship was almost flawless until its USB cord, which wasn't detachable and designed similar to that of Apple chargers, got crazy on me. There were times that with the slightest touch or movement, the connection will be cut. There were times it won't connect at all. This time, there wasn't any spare part replacement. :-(

So I did what I always did - order from Ynzal. I didn't bother going to the mall and checking stores one by one. Ynzal has all the Wacom thingies I need, at the lowest price. Got myself a Wacom Intuos. It's the cheapest I could get! But how I wish Wacom retained their entry-level Bamboo line. I never really got convinced by the "high tech" extra advanced features of the more expensive Wacom models. Like what I always believed in -- "It's always the Indian, never the pana (bow)."

I ordered last Friday and I got it Saturday morning! Ynzal's super reliable! :-) The new Wacom Intuos reminds me of my first Wacom in terms of design. The USB connectivity is detachable, using a generic USB mini. Which means if ever the USB cord wonks out, I could replace it with a generic one! But I hope the pen is not as easily broken as the Bamboo model.

I was so excited about my new Wacom that I spent most of my Saturday trying it out, getting myself used to the new model. I decided to practice my comic art skills and tried out sketching, inking and coloring, all digitally! Also, lately, I have been obsessed about Cameron Stewart's art style. His digital inking skills are amazing! And I kinda like the new look he gave to the Bat-Girl reboot!

So let me share with you my practice artwork. It's based on one of Ellen Page's still from her movie Whip It, but I tweaked her hair a bit to resemble Emma Stone's new short bob (because I love it). And I changed the wardrobe a bit to look more like the Hurl Scouts' uniform (Ellen Page's roller derby team in Whip It).

I actually tried 3 different applications so I could find the best way to digitally ink my sketch: Adobe Illustrator, Adobe Photoshop and Manga Studio 5. For inking, based on my research, Cameron Stewart uses Manga Studio 5. So I downloaded a trial version and explored. I must say, the brushes available in the app were great. The feel was almost seamless, just like I was inking using a real pen. However, I think I am more comfortable with how Adobe Illustrator's brushes are snappy and a little corrective. Here's a GIF of the evolution from sketch, ink and color.

Bliss-ColorAnd here's the final artwork!

Bliss-Color

 

I'm starting to like doing comic art. Hopefully, I develop my own art style and maybe who knows, Wincy and I could come up with a comic series or a graphic novel. :-)


 

NOTE: This is not a sponsored post for Ynzal Marketing nor Wacom. I've bought all my Wacom tablets from Ynzal (except the Bamboo Fun). I just wanted to write about how efficient and reliable they have been with me through the years. :-)

 


Ye!!: Power Meant To Be Shared

Wincy and I love to go on road trips. Our last road trip was to Cavite, to visit Emilio Aguinaldo’s ancestral house. The ancestral house was big, with secret passageways built for easy escape. Reminded me of the Wayne Manor. There’s also this charming old man who toured us, telling us anecdotes about Aguinaldos and his own experiences as a volunteer tour guide and caretaker.

What’s fun in road trips isn’t just the destination but also the long drive. I like the feeling that we’re driving around, playing music and discussing ideas. I’d usually bring out my hand to touch the wind. (So cliche but still feels awesome.) 

But what’s not fun during road trips? This:

Weekends-Cj-de-SilvaClick on the image to see in full resolution!

I’m sure many of us experience having their phone batteries drained while on the road. So when you get to your destinations, you no longer have the chance to take photos and share it in real time. (Admit it, real-time sharing is addicting!)

That’s why I feel really lucky I discovered the Ye!! power bank. Now, I bring it with me literally wherever I go.

Ye!! Energy Xtreme is actually build for the outdoors. It has a rugged rubber coating that gives protection against impact. Even though I’m not outdoor-sy, I’m clumsy — I often drop things or things just slip away my hands. Also, it’s certified to international standard of IP65 which guarantees for effective water and dust resistance. It also has a socket door to completely seal and protect the USB sockets against water and dust.

Whoever sees my Ye!! Power Bank instantly just gets amazed by how powerful it is. (And how the color is so reminiscent of Bazooka bubblegum.) So far, Ye!! Power Bank has been very reliable for road trips and even out of the country trips.

I recently went to a convention in Singapore and this power bank has been my best friend. I had to take photos using my phone and share those shots real time. And occasionally check my emails. Without the Ye!! Energy Xtreme powerbank, my phone would’ve died before lunch time!

For a more detailed product description of Ye!! Energy Xtreme 5600mAh Portable Powerbank IP-65 BPR56

In the box:

  • Energy Xtreme BPR56
  • Micro USB Cable
  • User Manual

Key Features:

  1. IP65 certified - Impact, Splash and Dust Resistant
  2. Comprehensive protection in extreme environment
  3. Shocks and bumps absorbing rubberized surface
  4. Built-in LED flashlight for camping or other outdoors-at-night activities
  5. High power efficiency - more than 85%
  6. Over discharging, over charging, over-current and short-circuit protection

Technical Specifications

  • Capacity: 5,600mAh Lithium-ion Battery
  • Compatibility: iPad / Tablets, Android / Windows Phone, iPhone, iPod touch / Music Device, Game Console
  • Input: 5V - 1A (Micro USB)
  • Output: Single: 5V - 2.1A ; Dual: 5V - 1A + 1A
  • Charge Time: 7 - 8 hours
  • Standby Time: Up to 6 months
  • Talk Time: Up to 10 hours on 4G ; up to 15 hours on 3G
  • Product Dimensions: 10.05cm x 5.2cm x 2.8cm
  • Product Net Weight: 0.197 kg

Price - P1950

Available in all Digital Walker, Digital Hub and Beyond The Box branches. Distributed by Digits Trading.