The 3 Kinds of Guys You Will Meet In Your Life

Archetypes, by definition, are universally understood symbols (or characters) based on patterns and previous experiences. For me, we use archetypes to conveniently summarize our life as well as the people we meet.

As children, our parents trained us not to trust other people, especially strangers (who may be out to get us and hold us up for ransom). I guess before, it was simpler because we just have to examine whether someone is acting like a kidnapper, luring us with candies. But now that we’re much older, its quite a challenge to tell if we’re about to have our hearts broken by guys promising us romance.

So based on my personal experience, lots of second hand information and exposure to pop culture, here is an unofficial collection of modern-day archetypes of guys we all could meet (or have met).

The Asshole

He probably is the easiest to identify because he is straightforward to a fault. His confidence can come off as arrogance but often, he’s got something to brag. In a normal basis, don’t expect him to voluntarily open the door or wait for you when you walk together. For him, chivalry is an armor he wears when he’s out to a battle to impress someone. And that makes us perennially attracted to Assholes – the thrill of seeing the difference between the way he treats the girl he likes and the way he treats the world.

His psychology: “This is who I am, take it or leave it.”

Fictional Assholes:

• Chuck Bass as played by Ed Westwick in the TV series Gossip Girl
• Sherlock Holmes
• Dr. Gregory House as played by Hugh Laurie in the TV series House M. D.
• Don Draper as played by Jon Hamm in the TV series Mad Men
• Patrick Verona as played by Heath Ledger in the movie 10 Things I Hate About You

The Douche

He works out, drives a fancy car, plans his outfit for the day and he actually has a mental index of party pick up lines. He does everything over the top it becomes annoying. But The Douche is too concerned about his image for a reason – most of the time it is because he’s insecure. I would compare him to the durian fruit – pungent but can be a yummy eat. (Although I personally don’t like durian, you get what I mean.) When a girl uncovers what is behind the pa-cool image, The Douchebag can be thoughtful, honest and caring. (I know a lot of people will kill me for this but…) Just look at Scott Disick.

His psychology: “I have to build an image of a cool guy.”

Fictional Douche bags:

• Derek Zoolander as played by Ben Stiller in the movie Zoolander
• Schmidt as played by Max Greenfield in the TV series New Girl
• Jon Martello as played by Joseph Gordon Levitt in the movie Don Jon
• Seth as played by Jonah Hill in the movie Superbad
• Britt Reid/The Green Hornet as played by Seth Rogen in the movie The Green Hornet

The Jerk

Personally, I think The Jerk is the most dangerous of all because  he is unaware of how destructive he can be and he looks harmless. He is brooding and reflective most of the time because he is internally conflicted by insecurities. The Jerk starts off as a nice guy. But as you go along, you will feel his sense of self-entitlement and its as if the world owes him something. Or as I prefer to call it, pa-victim. And please, don’t be fooled by his sensitivity because he is just sensitive to himself.

His psychology: “I’ve been a nice guy all my life and the world owes me. I think it’s just fair if I break someone’s heart.”

Fictional Jerks:

• Scott Pilgrim
• Calvin Weird-Fields as played by Paul Dano in the movie Ruby Sparks
• Dan Humphrey as played by Penn Badgley in the TV series Gossip Girl
• Russell Hammond as played by Billy Crudup in the movie Almost Famous
• Troy Dyer as played by Ethan Hawke in the movie Reality Bites

To summarize the archetypes, my friend Celina and I made this Venn Diagram two years ago.

I have met assholes, jerks and douchebags. Some of them I became good friends with , a few of them I dated and some I even genuinely loved. And even though I have the archetypes always ready to help me thin-slice the guys I meet, I also learned that archetypes are oversimplification of  people. At the core, guys are complex people with insecurities, fears and dreams, all worth knowing. I believe we’re all smart enough to safeguard ourselves from each other. After all, like what Stephen Chbosky wrote in the book Perks of Being A Wallflower, “You receive the love you think you deserve.”

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Special thanks to Celina Borromeo for the Venn Diagram and all other inputs. 

My paper doll illustrations are all inspired by Kyle Hilton’s paper doll illustration.

And simply click the images to download the 1024 x 768 file that can be desktop wallpapers. 🙂